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The Iceman Cometh And The Outcomes Are So Boring, Y’all

lalagirl by lalagirl
May 23, 2026
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Supply: Drake / OVO Sound/Republic Data

Let’s get this out of the way in which: I’m not a Drake hater. 

I used to be there for Comeback Season and So Far Gone. Thank Me Later, Take Care, and Nothing Was The Similar had been the soundtracks to my faculty years. From 2007 to 2016, I used to be really fairly a giant Drake fan. I even noticed him in live performance a number of instances!  

I give this pretense to let or not it’s identified that if Drake dropped some straight warmth, I might gladly give him his flowers. However maybe appropriately, Drake’s a lot hyped Iceman has left me chilly. Making issues worse, the person had the audacity to launch the albums Maid of Honor and HABIBTI on the identical evening.

This man dropped 43 songs unexpectedly and couldn’t even do us the courtesy of constructing them good or, on the very least, memorable.  

We can’t speak about current-day Drake with out first wanting again to the traditional days of 2018. Drake’s first L got here by the hands of Pusha-T that 12 months, after Push went for the jugular and revealed that Drake had a secret son, successfully ending their beef earlier than he might even start. The meat derailed Drake’s take care of Adidas and delayed his upcoming album Scorpion. 

When Scorpion finally got here out, it was neither a scorched-earth response to the meat nor a defiant triumph. As a substitute, it laid the groundwork for what would grow to be of Drake’s output over the past decade: bloated, principally boring albums with just one or two songs he reveals up on. 

We additionally can’t speak about current-day Drake with out wanting again on the traditional days of 2024, when Kendrick Lamar popped out and caught a physique like John Stockton. Whereas Pusha received the meat by successfully going Maury Povich on Drake’s ass, over 4 tracks, Kendrick was surgical with it. He baited Drake with “Like That,” eviscerated Drake’s skill as a rapper on “Euphoria,” outlined all of the methods he fails as a person on “Meet The Grahams,” earlier than outright calling the person and his pal a bunch of pedophiles on “Not Like Us.”

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Which, you understand, isn’t helped by the truth that Drake has a loooot of sus bars (“Sierra Canyon car parking zone wanting like Magic Metropolis car parking zone” is a bizarre factor to say a few highschool.)

Kendrick decisively received the meat, and his victory lap included a number of Grammys and a Tremendous Bowl halftime present. Drake has principally laid low since dropping Some Horny Songs 4 U with PARTYNEXTDOOR final 12 months, and submitting lawsuits so he can relitigate his L in courtroom.

Clearly, Drake just isn’t over the meat as a result of a lot of the lyrical content material on Iceman is Drake relitigating his L on wax. His reunion with Future is titled “Ran to Atlanta” in reference to considered one of Kendrick’s strains on “Like That.” Monitor after observe has some reference to the meat, his insecurities stemming from it, and boasts that he’s nonetheless the GOAT, even when he’s not so assured in that assertion anymore. 

Which, like, tremendous, however he might’ve made that journey compelling. What am I alleged to do with bars like “I want compliments ‘trigger currently it’s simply falling-outs and disagreements, business is admittedly evil?”  How am I supposed to take a look at a bar like ,“They was at my birthday after I was searchin’ big-booty ebonies,” and never ask, “Why had been you doing that at your birthday?” Drake was alleged to be music for the girlies to bounce to, and now he’s scaring the hoes. 

Twitch streamer ShawnCee summed up the listening expertise greatest by asking, “The place are the bangers?” Even Drake’s worst albums normally have one or two songs that stand out. I’m pondering “Good For What” on Scorpion, “Jimmy Cooks” on Truthfully, Nevermind. Hell, I’d have even taken a “Truthful Commerce” from Licensed Lover Boy.  

I’m making an attempt to not be imply right here, y’all, as a result of all the listening expertise was simply unhappy. Every observe on Iceman simply drives residence the sensation that Drake in all probability ought to’ve gone to remedy as a substitute of the sales space. With this trio of albums, I assume Drake did accomplish one thing in displaying what it seems like when a rapper is totally checked out of their job.

It’s not all bricks, I assume? “Hoe Section” on Maid of Honor has some much-needed vitality, Sexxy Purple’s function on “Cheetah Print” is a humorous play on the cha-cha slide, however the total feeling is that Drake has misplaced his fastball. The hooks don’t hit, and there’s no ardour within the bars. Dropping 43 songs and having 5 (and that’s being beneficiant) stand out is such an interesting, self-inflicted L.

What I discover fascinating in all that is that in taking this strategy, Drake has but once more confirmed Kendrick proper. Drake is now not a ok artist to take the charts on bars alone, and clearly, he is aware of it. The ability transfer would’ve been to drop an all-killer, no-filler 10-track album the place Drake reminds everybody why he dominated the sport for thus lengthy. As a substitute, he selected to flood the zone with a lot music that it’s inevitable a few of it’s going to chart merely attributable to his most religious followers and folk listening out of curiosity. 

Will Drake win the numbers sport within the short-term? After all. It’s Drake. However is anybody going to recollect any of those songs by the autumn? I’m uncertain. Truthfully, it sort of makes me perceive why Drake sounds so disinterested in his work. If I needed to pump out 43 tracks of straight mid simply to remain related, I’d in all probability be over it too. 

SEE ALSO:

White Home Embarrasses Itself By Making an attempt To Be Draaaaaaaake!

OPINION: Is Drake Black Sufficient For Hip-Hop?

The Iceman Cometh And The Outcomes Are So Boring, Y’all
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